Einsteinism - My religion

The following is a hypothetical conversation between a receptionist of a company, and a person who wants to submit an application form.

Sir you have not filled in your religion in the application form.

Yes, I know.

What's your religion?

Perhaps I should not tell you my religion, lest I offend you or anyone processing this application form.

I'm sorry, but unfortunately, incomplete forms won't be accepted.

Well then, my religion is Einsteinism.

Ein.. what?

Einsteinism.

What kind of a religion is that? Do you believe Einstein is God?

Thankfully, Einstein himself didn't believe he's God. Moreover, he didn't believe there is one.

So you're more like a free thinker.

That's not what I am. That's what the supernatural religionists say I am.

Ok, but I have to write you as a free thinker.

Then I am forced to withdraw my application. You should also be aware that I can sue your company for not allowing me my right to religious freedom.

But you're a free thinker! What makes you think we're taking away your religious freedom?

Exactly what you just said. You are forcing "free thinking" on me. I'm not a free thinker. I'm an Einsteinist. I have my right to be an Einsteinist and not a free thinker.

What's the bloody difference?

What's the similarity?

[That] You don't believe in God?

Sorry, it may surprise you, but I do. Just that my God doesn't bother with me, doesn't punish me for sins or reward me for "good" deeds, nor does he answer prayers.

So you're a deist then.

Ah yes, the classic argument. Unfortunately you're wrong again. my God didn't bother with the universe, didn't bother with how humans must be shaped, and certainly didn't bother with the chemistry of how water is formed. Tell me, is the law of gravity a human being or a spirit?

Neither, everyone knows it's a law.

Then my God is a law, or I shall say it is a bunch of laws. There is no "God" but there are simply laws of nature, laws of physics, laws of chemistry and any other law that is irrefutable.

You contradict yourself.

I expected to hear that. And I'm going to prove you wrong. Does God have control over our lives?

Yes. We can't decide when we will die.

Do laws of physics have control over our lives?

Meaning?

Meaning, if you jump down a building, does the law of gravity have total control over your life or can you break it and save yourself?

Certainly I can't. I'm sure to die.

Hence, God is equal to the laws of physics. Which brings me to another point.

What?

Did the "God" of Bible tell you "Do not murder."?

Yes, but people do murder, if that's what you're coming to.

You're right. And you contradict yourself. If "God" has control over our lives, why is it that people still break his laws? My God has set for me the law of gravity, and I have tried breaking it. I can't! My God is the true God.

Makes sense. Anyway here's your application form, since you wish to withdraw it.

My pleasure.